Fruity Friends

The following thoughts, observations, opinions are not directed at any one group of people or church.  They are simply my heart felt, (broken  hearted) feelings observed over a lifetime of serving in and attending several different churches.   I am sharing them (only) in hopes we ... as in ME ... and you ... can learn and grow.

I’ve seen some huge chasms develop in the people in my life. Things I am still “mulling over” and trying to absorb, understand and get through.  Some of these situations shocked me in good ways, some shocked me in very sad ways.  I am still "processing" and praying over them.

I opened my Bible this morning to Mark chapter 4. This is one of the places in the Bible, where God talks about conditions for sowing a seed.

I felt Holy Spirit tell me, 

“people … friends … are like seeds.”

Some are like seeds sown along the wayside. They are only there for a moment they never even take root.

Some are rocky ground. They receive you with gladness, but they have no root.  They don’t hang around very long and when trouble comes, they shrivel up quickly and fall away. 

Some are like seed sown among thorns. Their cares, their needs and their wants choke out anything you need. The relationship is all about what you can do for them. If that ever changes they disappear and leave you standing alone. 

Then there’s good ground. Their roots go deep, they can withstand a little hardship. They produce good fruit, they impart good things and blessings into your life, just as you impart good, and bless their life.  They know how to give as well as they know how to receive. They produce shade in the heat. And can cover you when hard times hit. Sometimes they can last a lifetime.  Fruity friends. 

Fruity friends are the best!

Thank you. Thank you to every one of my “good ground”, “fruity” friends. Your loving kindness has truly sustained me these last few months. 

But, there are the other kind, too… 

Our world is a mess mainly because the body of Christ is a mess. 

If there are people … friends … in your life that you hug their neck on a regular basis; look them right in the face and tell them you love them … Don’t you dare leave them stranded in a storm. 

You make yourself a hypocrite and Christianity a lie when you do.

Everyone has cares of this world. Everyone has problems. The Word of God is not contingent upon your life being smooth sailing. If you don’t know what the Bible has to say about this situation, you’re only proving my point. But, I promise you, the Word of God, is prolific with how you are to treat the “widow, orphan, sojourner, those in prison, those sick… Etc.”. Frankly, the Bible says, unless you do show them love and kindness you won’t be blessed. So, if things in your life have been a little rocky and stormy lately, you might want to “circle back” to these passages; start living, according to the Word of God and see if things in YOUR life don’t improve.

They say it takes a village to raise a child. I strongly disagree with that. Every village has a few idiots and I wouldn’t want them anywhere near my children. 

It does take a family. It takes a “family” for anyone to survive in this world. Not everybody is blessed with a biological, extended family that loves, cares and wants to help. That is one of the reasons why God defines the body of Christ as a family.  

Even if you have a wonderful, biological family. There is nothing like your church family. There is a special bond with the people that you worship with every week that no one can replace.

The Bible also says many hands make the load light. Every person in a “family” can each do some thing, no matter how small, to help someone in crisis. 

How difficult is it to freeze a few leftovers and take them to someone that, frankly, just doesn’t have the time or energy to cook themselves a decent meal?

How difficult is it to stop by their house, as you pass by on a weekly basis, to give them a hug; pray for them; and tell them you love them, and you are thinking about them?

How difficult is it to pick up the phone take five minutes and do the above if you can’t go in person?

How difficult is it to stop by a single mothers and gave her $20 to buy her gas to work that week?

How difficult is it to box up your children’s old clothes and give them to a family struggling?

How difficult is it to mow the yard of that elderly neighbor, as you’re doing yours?

How difficult is it to obey the word of God? 

It’s far easier than living the life of not obeying it!

I truly believe there are many amazing men and women of God, that could do so much to help the church body, that have fallen away DEEPLY wounded, because they were left stranded in a storm. 

Their  failure will not just be their responsibility on judgment day. God has assigned each Christian to be part of a local church, family or body. That means we’re responsible for each other in those moments. And when we all stand before God, I do believe He will have something to say about how we either hindered or helped their downfall.

There used to be an old rhyme, when I was growing up. It was used (as a condemnation) to illustrate people who were very selfish and greedy.  It went something like this… “Me, my wife, my son, John, and his wife. Us four no more!”  

I now fear that is how the world defines the church.

There is an old movie, based on an older novel, called, “Nicholas Nickleby“. It’s a very interesting story. If you haven’t seen the movie, I encourage you to.  One of it’s most tragic storylines is simply this … The person you throw away because they are of no value to you… may, in fact, be the most valuable person in your life one day, but it will be too late … much too late for you. 

Let me just add this little PS… I once listened to a conversation about someone who had been wounded in a church setting. One person (flippantly) remarked, “They could choose not to pick up that offense. If they get offended, it’s their fault.”

On a very basic level. I agree with (some of) that statement. 

If everybody gets invited to the movies but you. Don’t pick up that offense. It was probably an oversight.

If everyone gets to sing a solo at church, but you. Don’t pick up that offense. Again, it was probably an oversight.

If leadership seems to always be friendly to other people instead of you, again, don’t go there. 

If your efforts and work in a church are never acknowledged, that’s not healthy, but don’t let it offend you. God is keeping record, even if nobody else acknowledges it.

But to use that statement or train of thought to dismiss someone’s genuine, broken heart is cruel. 

The word of God tells us that if you even think someone has “aught against you” you should go to them, and try to restore your relationship to a place of love.

How will we ever win the lost if we can’t even love and care for each other … even in their most broken moments? 

If we can’t even emulate a gospel they would want there is no hope they’ll listen to anything we have to say.

If your church family has conquered this mountain, I truly salute you. I commend you and I genuinely admire and respect you.  Your pastor(s) have taught their sheep well. But, in my life, which now has spanned several decades, lol, I just haven’t seen it applied very often.

It is truly heartbreaking. I can only imagine how it break God’s heart.

How are we ever going to win the lost if we can’t even love each other?

How are we ever going to fix this broken world if we have no desire to (at least try to) help the person that sits next to us on Sunday morning when they are hurting?

We’re not.

So … 

pray for our leaders. 

Pray for revival. 

Vote according to the word of God. 

Share information on Facebook and elsewhere that needs to get out there about the crisis in our nation… 

Go ahead… 

Do it all… 

But until the church becomes the church and learns to Love we are all pretty much wasting our time.