One step at a time

I want to think. And, I don't want to think. I want to know and, I don't want to know. She stunned me with her bravery.  We were at a prayer retreat.  We were praying for each other, the world and whatever came up.  She brought a letter out and through her tears said it was from her daughter, in jail.  There were a few gasps but not from me.  I wanted to hold her.  To tell her I understood.  I felt her pain and I admired her bravery.  My babies have stumbled too.  In different ways.  In different paths but, no less dangerous.  There have been days, week and months I didn't know if one of my children were alive or dead.  Then, when I did hear from them ... it wasn't always good news.  No, I didn't gasp when she pulled the letter out and asked us to pray.  I prayed.  Later, I did my best to encourage her.  I was looking in the mirror.  Everyone thinks their pain is the worst, the hardes...

This morning I was reading in John 5.  I actually picked up from where I was reading from days previous.  I've started a new job and getting a morning routine worked out that involved praying, some (even very limited) form of exercise and reading has been a challenge but, today I did it!  *Yeah me!*  So it's been a few days but it sure felt good.  John 5:30 "I seek not Mine own will ..."  (Jesus talking) but He didn't stop there.  He continued, "but, the will of Him Who sent Me..."  That second part stuck out to me.  It is good to not seek your own will, most of the time (talking about us now).  When you are a parent you have to put the child's needs first.  If your newborn wake up screaming at 6am you don't just roll over, keep sleeping and let them scream.  When your teenager is brokenhearted and sobbing at 11 PM you don't just tell them to "suck it up" because you have to get up early for work and go to bed. ...